Why I Call Myself a Feminist Therapist and the tools I use in practice
When you go to graduate school for counseling you learn about the history of mental health treatment and the different therapy modalities that have developed over the years. The main umbrella terms/approaches are cognitive behavioral, humanistic, psychodynamic, and holistic/integrative. Within each of these are different theorists and interventions. As a professor of counseling, my anecdotal evidence shows that the majority of students like to say that they can’t choose one theory and they label themselves as an integrative therapist. The truth is we all tend to lean towards certain approaches for two reasons: who we are as people and the population of our clients. Certain approaches are definitely more effective for certain populations. For instance, if you look into disordered eating or substance use populations you will see a lot of Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT), Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), and Motivational Interviewing (MI).
It really all depends on who you are treating.
In my private practice, I work mostly with women who have experienced trauma and struggle with anxiety, self-esteem, and depression often as a result of unhealthy or abusive relationships. Women feel ignored, brushed-off, or like they are unworthy of love. They label themselves as bad mothers (they aren’t), they blame themselves fully for the issues in their relationships (it’s not their fault), and they have trouble acknowledging they are successful (they are!). During my intake session with a client, when I am explaining my approach I always say - “I take a feminist approach. This just means that you are in control of these sessions and if I ever reflect anything or say anything to you that doesn’t sit right or you feel I am completely wrong, I want you to tell me. I am not the expert on your life.” Here are some of the tools/interventions I use as a therapist who works with women.
Feminist Counseling
Being a feminist counselor does not mean my focus is on promoting the hatred of men. People hear feminist anything and they call me a misandrist (someone literally wrote that on my instagram recently ::eyeroll::) who wants to ruin everything for men. But what it really means is that the focus of therapy is on the woman in session and her experiences out in the world. You see how already we are shifting from something being man-centric (if you focus on the woman you must hate men, blah, blah, blah) to being about the the needs of the woman in front of me as a therapist (without having to worry about how it affects anyone else).
Practically, it means I try, as much as possible, to keep the relationship egalitarian. There will always be an inherent power differential in the eyes of the client who sees the therapist as the expert, but knowing that and acknowledging it is an important part of feminist practice. We often talk about the societal pressures of being a partner or a parent and how the expectations are different for women. I think a big part of a feminist approach is being comfortable with addressing the sociopolitical issues that cause so much of the internal struggles that women have. The goal for therapy is always empowerment. I want a client to feel empowered to set boundaries, ask for what they need, feel confident and successful, and have difficult conversations. And to be clear, empowerment does not come from the therapist, it comes internally from the client. The work we do in session is what helps them get to that point.
There is also an intersectional piece to feminist practice. A woman has many other identities and it is important that those are acknowledged and addressed in order for therapy to work. This has been especially true in the current political climate. For instance if a client is impacted by ICE and might live in fear of being affected by the presence of ICE because of the color of their skin. Yes we talk about it. It is terrifying to walk around with that kind of fear for you and/or members of your family.
Career concerns? Maternal health issues? The disparities for women of color are real. If you don’t help your client talk about them and process them when presented, then you are perpetuating the issue.
Bibliotherapy
Dr. Kelly Gentry holding a bookstack
I have written about bibliotherapy before. There are workbooks that are great tools for helping clients with certain issues. I have workbooks I have used with clients for self-esteem and body image. However, I also really love (and find effective) using literature/fiction as a therapeutic tool. book reviews I often share ideas for how specific books can be used as therapeutic tools for certain presenting problems (grief, trauma, estrangement, healthy relationships, etc). It just so happens that I have several clients who love to read and we are able to talk about how they connected with the story and/or characters is great “material” for a counseling session (or several). Bibliotherapy doesn’t have to be a formal process (but it can be!). That is what is so great about it.
I created a workbook that outlines how to use bibliotherapy as an intervention.
Check here for the next bibliotherapy workshop for therapists.
Intentional Travel
Travel can be SO healing. It can really be whatever you need it to be with the right mindset. Getting out of your regular everyday setting, removing the everyday tasks from your schedule, and letting go of the typical daily to-do list provides space for being alone with your own thoughts. I truly promote the idea of solo travel for women who are feeling overwhelmed and struggling with productivity and emotional regulation. But I believe group, family, and even business travel can work wonders, too. Intentional travel or what I call, the RESET Method of travel is an incredibly effective intervention.
I created a workbook for people who want to travel with intention. It is a great tool to use with clients.
Check here for the next Intentional travel workshop.
At the end of the day I don’t want clients walking away thinking that I “fixed’ them. Instead I want them to feel they know themselves and their needs better. I want them to walk away knowing what works best for them in their own lives.